Vanessa 
Nigerian media personality and Nollywood actress, Toke Makinwa, has spoken candidly about the emotional and societal pressures of being single and childless at 40. In the latest episode of her Toke Moments podcast, titled “I Am Growing Up, Not Old,” she admitted that the thought once terrified her, but she has learned to embrace her reality.
“Regret is exhausting,” Makinwa said. “The hardest thing I could say to myself is that I’m 40, single, and childless. But I said it, and I did not die.”
Makinwa, who was previously married to businessman Maje Ayida before their divorce in 2017, has been the subject of marriage rumors over the years. In 2024, there was speculation that she had secretly tied the knot with longtime friend Farouk Umar, but she swiftly debunked the claims, stating that the alleged wedding was actually a Thanksgiving event.
“If I Had Remarried, I’d Be Divorced Again”
Reflecting on her past, Makinwa admitted that if she had remarried after her first divorce, she likely would have faced another separation. “The lessons never stop,” she said. “I’m grateful for the journey. I could look at my life and feel like people have passed me, or I can see that I’ve built an empire, I’m a resounding voice in Africa, and I’m surrounded by love.”
The actress acknowledged that societal expectations can be overwhelming, but she emphasized the importance of self-acceptance. She urged people to embrace their truth and recognize that life unfolds differently for everyone.
“Embracing the Journey: Love, Growth, and Hope”
Makinwa reassured her listeners that being single and childless is not a permanent state. “I’m not always going to be without a spouse or a child if I so desire it. What I desire, desires me too,” she stated.
She highlighted the importance of personal growth, saying that when the right person comes along, she will be in a better emotional and mental space for a healthy relationship. “Sometimes, I’m happy and lucky that I get to experience life this way and learn my lessons. Eventually, when the person that’s made for me comes along, I’ll be more mature, and I’ll know what it takes to sustain a relationship.”
Makinwa’s reflections challenge societal norms, offering a powerful message on self-worth, patience, and embracing life’s journey on one’s own terms.
